Garlic Jokes

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A man walks into a produce store. He looks for an employee but doesn't find anyone. Desperately, he approaches a pile of garlic. "Do you work here?" he asks the pile. The garlic bulbs respond, "No, we're cloves." The man says, "But your sign says you're open."
How to roast garlic:
Rent a hall, invite guests to dinner honoring garlic, hire band, hire comedians, approach dias, face audience, lift champagne flute, and then profanely mock garlic's accomplishments.

Did You Hear About The Restaurant on The Moon? Jokes

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?
Yes, it has great food but no atmosphere.

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?
Yes, Zagat says it has "great food" but "no atmosphere."

Related: "Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?" joke explained to children. 

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?
You did? Where did you hear aobut it, at your job at NASA?

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Seems pleasant, but has a dark side.

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food but lousy delivery.

Related: Yelp Reviews for The Restaurant on the Moon 

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Can't miss it, right next to the sign, "LAST FOOD BEFORE MARS."

Yelp Reviews for The Restaurant On The Moon

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The Restaurant On The Moon

3.5 star rating 394 reviews
Rating details $$  Diners

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Map
The Restaurant on The Moon
Sea of Tranquility Port #1, Sea of Traquility, The Moon
Get Directions

Phone number: (800) GR8-FOOD
Business website nasa.gov/seaoftranquilityport1/restaurantonthemoon

Review Highlights
"By now you've probably heard about the restaurant on the moon..." in 348 reviews.
"Great food but no..." in 347 reviews.

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Recommended Reviews
Jeff S.
San Francisco, CA
314 friends, 671 reviews, Elite '15
3.0 star rating
1 check-in
"Great food but no atmosphere."
Comment from Oscar B. of The Restaurant On The Moon
Business Owner
"Thank you so much for your review. It pains me to say this, but the joke is on you, Jeff.  We have atmosphere courtesy of our oxygen tanks and gravitation monitors. If you were as observant in real life as you are snarky online, Jeff, you would had noticed them upon descent."

Wendy E.
Hollywood, Fl
99 friends, 32 reviews
2.5 star rating
"I heard The Restaurant On The Moon has great food but no atmosphere."
Comment from Oscar B. of The Restaurant On The Moon
Business Owner
"Sounds like conjecture based on hearsay. I've contacted Yelp about removing this and other 'reviews.' When you're ready to review our actual restaurant, Tina, I'll have a complimentary cup of coffee drink waiting for you."

Harris J.
Miami, FL
45 friends, 6 reviews
3.5 star rating
"Great food but no atmosphere."
Comment from Oscar B. of The Restaurant On The Moon
Business Owner
"Thanks for your review slash joke. If we had a nickel for every time we heard that joke, we'd close shop and retire on Phobos. At least we can both agree with the set-up, Harris: we do have great food."

Hack List August 2015: On a Very Special...

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Here's a list of television episodes considered hacky during the month of August, 2015:

Sister, Sister
On a very special Sister, Sister, Tia and Tamera win the Twins Beauty Contest Original Sketch Comedy Competition, only to admitting their mirror routine was ripped off from The Marx Brothers' Duck Soup.

Foul-Ups, Bleeps, and Blunders
On a very special Foul-Ups, Bleeps, and Blunders, host Don Rickles mistakenly calls the show "Dick Clarke's TV's Bloopers & Practical Jokes."

Wings
On a very special Wings, the two Hackett brothers, Helen, Roy, Fay, Scarpacci, and Lowell run out of comedic situations and search for an author.

Hack List July 2015: On a Very Special...

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Here's a list of television episodes considered hacky during the month of July, 2015:

Diff'rent Strokes
On a very special Diff'rent Strokes, Dudley turns down Arnold's second offer to visit a bicycle store.

Family Ties
On a very special Family Ties, it's the house versus the Keaton Family as the house becomes sentinent.

Blossom
On a very special Blossom, an escalating yet absurd misunderstandings leads to comedic mishaps resulting into a half hour of entertaining escapism television.

Hack List June 2015

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Here's what's hacky during the month of June, 2015:

  • Go to Wahlburgers and ask to compliment the chef, Ken Wahl.
  • Kickstart an ultimately disappointing documentary.
  • Head up own ass, return a better person.