Order your meal here, close the deal at home.
Please don't wait for your order at our tables. Tables are for closers.
New! To-Go only! Morning Meeting Munchbox.
One state-of-the-art insular paper portable canteen of inferior coffee.
One dozen of our Business Breakfast Bagels. Guaranteed to have one good bagel and eleven inedible ones. First come, first served: fresh lobster bagel, plain (thawed), plain (stale), mincemeat, sticky onion, rock salt, one everything bagel featuring poppies, and 6 pumpernickels.
Cream Cheese Straw Pack: 2 plain cream cheese straws, 2 chives, 2 strawberry cream, 1 chococheese, 2 salmon, 1 vanilla frosting.
Morning Meeting Muffins: blueberry, cranberry, bran, corn. WARNING: Muffins turn poisonous when left in an office kitchen.
New! High Quantity Low Price Sandwiches Tray
12 Meter-Long Sub sandwiches for just $8.99. Feed your family or eat them all yourself. We won't judge.
New! To-Go only! Pizza Pizza Pizza Pizza Pizza 5 Pie Pizza Pie
5 large combos come out of the oven and get stacked into a deep-dish pizza box. Pizza Pizza Pizza Pizza Pizza 5 Pie Pizza Pie contains one Meat Tapper's pizza, one Veggie Shagger's pizza, one Hawaiian Lover's pizza, one Sex Liker's pizza, and one pepperoni.
New! To-Go only! Bucket of Pork Chops.
Make your party a pork chop party. Sample a dozen of our brand-name pork chops: 2 OriginalChops, 2 CrispyChops, 1 DoubleChop, 1 Bacon DoubleChop, 2 Apple Sauce Stuff'dChops, 2 BeefChops, 1 MysteryChop, and 6 piece ChopNuggets.
New! To-Go only! Miley Cyrus Birthday Cake.
Luscious velvet chocolate cake frosted with the inscription: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MILEY CYRUS!
Coffee. Small $1.25. Large $1.45. Choice of Greek columns or stud poker paper cup.
Tea. Small $1.25. Large $1.45. Served in a Styrofoam cup. Choice of blue teabag label, orange label, or fancy label.
Don't forget to mention Meter-Long Sub sandwiches are made from rat meat.
Did you by chance go forward in time and include this email thread in the menu again?