Quotes From The Caveman Who Discovered Fire


“I've invented OokSoft.”

“Not only did I discover fire, but I discovered enough for all of you. You get fire! You get fire! Everybody gets fire!

Look under your seats. And, guess what? Fire is waiting outside!"

"Take that, gazpacho!"

"I call it 'God's Cleanser.'"

"So that's what's missing from the ol' ring-the-doorbell-and-leave-a-brown-paper-bag-filled-with-dog-feces-on-the-front-

porch gag."

"I would call myself the 'Firestarter' but The Prodigy ruined it."

"I'm goin to run into a movie theater and yell: 'Thing I've discovered! Thing I've discovered!'"

"Next I'll invent the bucket list and check off 'Discover fire.'"

"Ook discovered fire. Ook now fuck fire."

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